Romans 8:29
"What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us?"
It's been exactly one month since Beau left us. It still doesn't seem real. I don't imagine it ever really will.
That being said, I believe that God is exactly who He says He is, and for that very reason I believe that He will carry us through this tragedy that was the end of Beau's physical life....but the beginning of a lifetime spent in heaven. Beau is no longer in pain or short of breath. But we are. We miss him so much that it physically hurts, but we can take a small amount of comfort in the fact that he is seeing and doing things that we can only dream about and given the choice, he would not come back to us. Our Sunday School teacher used to tell us nearly every week that "God never promised us an easy life. He just promised not to leave us or forsake us." My family is clinging to this promise now just as we have over the past two years.
Speaking of the last two years, we would not have made it through without the incredible friends and family we have been blessed with. Words can't express our gratitude and there are too many special people to name here but you know who you are. I've found that when horrible, unexplainable things happen (and we've had more than our fair share), it helps me to think of things that I can be thankful for in spite of all the bad. For Beau, I am thankful that he got the chance to do what he loved and the chance to be really good at it. Beau had dreams and he got to live out many of them...lots of people never get that chance even if they live 100 years. He was surrounded by people that loved him and believed in him and these people gave him the opportunity to race at many different levels. He even got to do two days of testing at Daytona before he got sick...he never got the chance to run his race there, but he did travel around that 2.5 mile track at nearly 200 mph and I can honestly say I have never seen him as happy as he was that day!
Another thing I can be thankful for is our Christian upbringing and that fact that Beau knew and accepted Jesus at an early age. I Thessalonians 4:13 tells us not to mourn as those who have no hope because we know that we will see Beau again some day. I literally can't imagine what it would be like to not have that hope at a time like this.
I can also be thankful for Jessica being in Beau's life. The things that they went through together and the way that she took care of him was pure evidence of God being totally in control of their relationship. I don't believe she could have done it any other way. I've never seen anything like the devotion that they had towards one another and I'm grateful that they got to experience that.
In the weeks and months ahead, our family and especially Jessica will have to adjust to a new life...we don't have a choice in the matter. We do, however, have a choice in how we respond to what has happened. We can be bitter and cynical and complain about bad things happening to good people. Or we can choose to praise God for giving Beau a great life and letting us be a part of it. That's what I choose to do. I hope you all will do the same.
I'd like to ask everyone to do something if you feel comfortable with it. Leave a comment below and tell us something about Beau and his life that you are thankful for. It helps me to think of those things. Hopefully it will help you, too.